Night Off: Mama’s First Night Away
Last week I had my first night off. Mia is two next month. This wasn’t by design. I hadn’t consciously never been away from her, the opportunity had just not presented itself. On Tuesday I had an all day conference at work and we all stayed overnight. So I had to leave her with Dada.
Usually I think of myself as a very laid back personality, this has pros and cons; it’s very difficult to convince people you care about things when your response is usually not to worry! When it comes to Mia, however, I find myself a worrying hand-ringer, constantly wondering ‘what if?’. I am a control freak, so if I’m not there I panic. We didn’t know how she would react and I was a 2 hour drive away and I hadn’t driven myself so getting back wouldn’t be easy if it was a total sh*t show. Mama is the one constant she has had since birth; yes I go to work, yes I’ve been out for the day, but I’ve always been there either to put her to bed or first thing in the morning.
The Actual Night
I found that actually I worried more in the build up than on the actual day; there was nothing I could do about it so we might as well get on with it. During the day I was far more concerned about getting there, getting the projector to work, organising everything and later, eating a nice meal and drinking some wine! The next day, whilst I was delighted I was going to see her, I wasn’t itching to get back to her as I thought I would be.
Whilst I won’t be rushing off to book a 3 week holiday away without Mia, I won’t be half as worried if the opportunity to spend a night away arises. I feel a bit silly about how wound up I got before going away, but I don’t think I *should* feel silly about it; it’s natural for a mama to want to be around her baby and the first time you do something involving your child there will always be nerves and anxiety. It’s a learning curve.
Mia’s Night Off
Last week was odd. Everyone kept getting up really early and I was super tired. One of the days was definitely super early as I was at Nana & Grandad’s and Ben & Holly wasn’t on yet. Then Dada picked me up; that doesn’t usually happen. It was nice, I liked it. I like doing different things, it’s fun. When we got home I called for Mama but I couldn’t find her. I thought it was a little bit odd but Mama always comes back so I just played with my toys. Dada gave me some dinner and tried to put me to bed, but I’d had a big nap so I wanted to run around a bit more. Then we got up early again. I couldn’t find Mama but Dada was there and we were at home like usual so I thought maybe she would be back soon. We went to Nana and Grandad’s like I usually do. I had my nap and when I woke up Mama was there. It was nice to see her. But I always knew she would be back soon.